I'm being challenged these days by the example of two women - Lindsey & Larissa - both of whom I've never met and probably never will. In their respective sets of [what most would count as extremely difficult] circumstances, Lindsey and Larissa are living lives marked by grace, peace, patience, and an undeniable faith and trust in Jesus.
Despite being raised by believing parents and walking this road of faith for some time, I often find trusting Jesus to be quite the difficult endeavor. I'll grasp some theological concept or heart lesson, then find myself questioning whether I understood it correctly or - more often than I'd wish - whether it's really true in the first place. I remember seasons during college when I would get so fed up with the seeming endless flood of questions and doubts and my inability to sustain a life of faith. In that place, my walk with the Savior felt so frustrating and fruitless. Lately, the place that I've been in spiritually has been very similar, and I've struggled with how to continue to walk with Jesus in the midst of some unanswered - and seemingly unanswerable - questions.
I find freedom in the knowledge that the Father is not like me. I seriously lack follow-through, but he keeps his promises and makes good on his word every time. I'm learning, now, that it isn't up to me to sustain my faith, but that faith, like all good things, is a gift and is sustained by the Father.
I'm beginning to learn, too, that he is always, always good to his children - even in those circumstances that cause us pain. The psalmist writes, "It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn your statutes." I believe that we can learn about and experience the character and attributes of God during all seasons of life, but is it not true that a season of difficulty and pain has a way of reminding us of our need of God and of focusing our attention on those things that are lasting and eternal? Praise God that the jury isn't out on whether he is good every time that I have a difficult day (or month or year)! His goodness, like all of his attributes, is pure and complete.
I may always struggle, to some extent, with doubt - but because HE is steady, both in his character and his love toward me, I am able to come to him on happy days, difficult days, and every other sort of day in between.
Thanks be to God.
