inspiring.

Tomorrow, the 21st, I will have been in Boston for one month - and, friends, what a month it has been. :) I came to Boston with no small number of expectations, and high on the list was the assumption that this move would bring about a period of self-reflection. If you know me well, you'll recognize that it doesn't take much for me to go there - often, a good film or a conversation with friends will move my thoughts in the general direction of the inner life. That being said, moving to Boston and working alongside both the staff and clients at the Mission has offered a unique opportunity for insights into the workings of my mind and heart.

Living in Boston thus far has been both wonderful and exceedingly challenging. So many changes have taken place over a relatively short period of time, which sometimes leaves me feeling like I'm just trying to catch up. I'm adjusting to walking and riding the subway everywhere, living off of a VISTA stipend (and, as of today, actually following a budget), and being in an urban environment 100% of the time. I no longer have the option to hop in the Camaro, crank up the latest in my revolving collection of favorite tunes, and drive off into the sunset. These days, I can't simply run across campus or drive across town to meet up with a friend.

This new place, though, is the fulfillment of my dreams for the last two years (dramatic? yes, but nonetheless true!). I get to live in a fabulous city, with skyscrapers and wonderful food from all over the world and a snazzy public transit system. I don't have to worry with the concerns of the upkeep and insurance of a vehicle. And I get to work with people who desperately need to know that someone believes in their ability to change for the better - which, because of God's grace shown to me, I absolutely do.

For those of you who pray, I'd like to ask for prayer for a couple of things: first, I'll be spending part of Christmas Day at the Mission with our clients, many of whom are estranged from their families. The holidays are an especially rough time of year for those dealing with addiction. Will you ask that, on Christmas Day, God would strengthen the hearts and will of these men and women? My hope is for them to know, in a very real way, the joy of the season. If we take seriously the teachings of Christ, people like our clients - former addicts, prostitutes, and others forgotten and ignored by society - are seen as infinitely valuable and welcome to participate in God's work of new creation. Isn't that what Christmas is about, anyways - God's good news breaking into the human story and opening the way for something beautifully new? Second: I am hoping to do some case work during my time at the Mission, and it seems that this might happen sooner rather than later. Though working directly with the women clients is something that I'm passionate about doing, I'm still a bit nervous. As I learn more about what it takes to be a caseworker, would you ask God to give me an open, teachable spirit - both when it comes to spiritual and practical insights?

By the way, it has been snowing all day yesterday and today and is currently 20* (but feels like 7!) It has actually warmed up a bit from this afternoon. I sincerely feel happy to be here at Christmastime - yes, it's terribly cold and kind of yucky, but beautiful. I'll post pictures soon.

poetic.

Peace Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
Where there is injury, pardon,
Where there is doubt, faith,
Where there is despair, hope,
Where there is darkness, light, and
where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master, grant that I may not
so much seek to be consoled, as to console;
To be understood, as to understand;
To be loved, as to love;
For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

Saint Francis' prayer sits on my desk at the Mission. It was here when I arrived and has been a source of encouragement to me thus far in my journey. May God grant all of us the desire and strength of spirit to be an instrument of his peace.

melodic.

Though my main focus at the Boston Rescue Mission will be to organize, streamline, and implement new policy for the operations department, this week was intended to be a more general orientation to the Mission's various programs. In that vein, Tuesday afternoon was passed helping to make preparations for the 3:00 meal (open to the public) and 4:30 meal (provided for our clients who are enrolled in either our detox or prisoner re-entry program and live at the Mission). I was assigned the task of peeling sweet potatoes and butternut squash along with two clients, Amber and Hanna. Amber, though friendly, was on the quiet side. Hanna, on the other hand, was outgoing and funny. I liked her immediately.

At first glance, I don't have too much in common with our clients. Many grew up in abusive homes, where manipulation and drug abuse were commonplace. Most have dealt with addiction of some sort - alcohol, cocaine, heroin, OTC drugs. All have lost much. A deeper look, though, reveals those qualities common to us as human beings: the need for acceptance, love, security. It is from this place that I begin the process (which is quite simple but feels complex in this new context) of getting to know the clients.

As Hanna and I went about our potato peeling, we made small talk, chatting about the weather, the Mission, our hobbies. She told me that she loved music - "all kinds!" she insisted, when I asked about a favorite genre - and that she liked to sing. As quite the music-lover myself, I suggested that we sing something to pass the time. Hanna seemed to perk up at the idea and asked if I knew any Christian songs, to which I responded that I did, in fact, know quite a few. "What about All in All?" she asked, and we began to sing. In recent years I've taken a liking to more traditional sacred music, and in turn have discounted many modern praise and worship songs as lacking in depth, musicality, or both. As I sang with Hanna, though, I delighted in the realization that the simplicity of the chorus was beautifully relevant and accessible to us both.

You are my strength when I am weak
You are the treasure that I seek
You are my all in all
Seeking you like a precious jewel
Lord to give up, I'd be a fool
You are my all in all

Jesus, lamb of God
Holy is your name (2x)

Taking my sin, my cross, my shame
Rising again, I bless your name
You are my all in all
When I fall down, you pick me up
When I am dry, you fill my cup
You are my all in all

Hanna and I kept singing, discovering that we knew many of the same songs. After a few minutes, she revealed that she had been attending church services in prison and had been encouraged by the music there. I'm reminded of the story in 1 Samuel (in the Hebrew scriptures) of King Saul and a young David. The King was tormented, according to the scriptures, by an evil spirit. David, in the service of the King, would play his lyre, bringing relief to the King's weary mind. Though the times and circumstances are different, I think that music is as powerful today, capable of bringing rest to the spirit of she who is in dire need of such. I was inspired this week to think creatively about ways that I might bring a greater appreciation of music to the Mission and to our clients.

This is gonna be fun. :)

new.

Today was my first day at the Mission. I was introduced to most of the directors (finance, IT, programs, operations) and met with several of them, including my immediate supervisor, Win. Win's an older guy, probably a few years shy of 60, but has the energy of someone half his age. He heads up the Operations department, the area in which I'm going to be working, and I have a feeling that I'm going to love working with him. First of all, he suggested getting to know one another over a cup of coffee at the Boston Beanstock Coffee Company (my kind of guy)! Second, he has this really beautiful way of viewing the Mission's clients (a term used here to refer to the homeless individuals who come through our doors). Win "spoke from his gut," as he kept saying, reminding me of the upside-down nature of the kingdom of God as expressed in Scripture. He talked about how many passages in the Bible speak to the ease with which the poor and humble see God's kingdom. In other words, the poor - whether in possessions or in spirit, as Jesus spoke of in his sermon on the mount recorded in Matthew's gospel - are in a unique position in which to receive God's blessing.

I can't say that I understand much of this yet. I am, however, starting to realize that this year working with the poor will change me. I'm quite sure that I'll see and experience things that I haven't before. I'll be called upon to embrace a greater sense of interdependence among those with whom I'm working (when I'd rather, oftentimes, attempt to go it alone), and I'll be consistently expected to step into roles and relationships that are less-than-comfortable.

Though I can't anticipate what lies before me, I am so happy to be here. For the first time in several years, I think, I truly feel that I am following my heart. When I was heading up the prayer ministry at the BSM during college, I was struck by this passage in Isaiah's book:

The Spirit of the LORD God is upon me, for the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound. ESV

Some of you will know that Luke records Jesus reading these words of the prophet at the commencement of his ministry, implying that he was the fulfillment of Hebrew scripture. In both instances, it touches my heart that God desires such things for his children: healing, freedom, release from the chains that bind - ultimately, wholeness. Is this not the kingdom coming on earth as it does in heaven?

mysterious.

In exactly a month and a half, I'll be moving to Boston. I accepted a position through AmeriCorps at the Boston Rescue Mission, where I'll be working as the operations assistant. (More about what, exactly, I'll be doing later.)

Nearly since birth I've lived in Northeast Texas, where I have a pretty good idea about how things work. I know what to expect as far as the climate goes: fairly mild most of the year with hot summers. I understand the general social standing on such issues as gun control, environmental policy, and gay marriage: for, neutral, against. I've been an avid Rangers fan, danced on a Texas drill team (complete with the token cowboy boots and hat), attended a Southern Baptist church, and am a proud alumnus of Stephen F. Austin State University, home of the fightin' Lumberjacks.

Though I've moved a couple of times and have experienced numerous paradigm shifts and changes over the years, Boston is a new kind of monster. All that I know of the city I have read on wikipedia and a handful of other similarly sourced websites, have "seen" thanks to goodsearch's image search, and have navigated via google maps. Needless to say, much of Boston is unknown to me, and will remain as such until I'm there - living, working, and playing in the place that will soon be my home. The city, and the following days and months and years of my life, are truly a mystery to me.

This blog is intended to be a written expression of my experiences over the next year. I hope that you will read it often and leave comments: ask me questions, challenge me in my thinking, encourage me. You, my family and friends, are my greatest gift. Thanks for coming along for the ride as I explore Boston and God's heart for the poor.