Over the past few months, there has been one client at the Mission with whom I've built a special friendship. This lady (who I'll just call A) and I consumed a lot of coffee together and had more than a few good conversations about everything from our favorite music and our plans for the weekend to our individual struggles and joys.
A began using drugs as a teenager and had, to this point, lived a life marked by dysfunction and pain. As we spent time together, I entered into this pain so far as she allowed me to, feeling the weight of her burden; at times, it was staggering. I grew to care for her and deeply hope for her healing and transformation. Though it seemed impossible for her to imagine, I felt as if God gave me eyes to see the beauty that she possessed. Through these eyes, I prayed not only for her recovery from the disease of addiction but also for her complete restoration through the love and grace of Jesus.
Today, my heart hurts. I learned earlier from A's case manager that she had relapsed this weekend after running into an old group of friends with whom she had used. It's difficult, and maybe impossible, to understand the reasons for A's decision, and I think that I'd waste time and energy in doing so -- but the following are two things that I do know: addiction, at its core, is a disease of deception and when relationships are broken, no matter the reason, it's painful. and it sucks.
please, if you believe that it makes a difference, pray for A.
thanks.
